‘No Traditional Raw Meat Sandwiches for Christmas’ Begs State Health Department

There have been plenty of strange stories over the course of 2020, from a near-miss of World War III in Iran, through a pandemic riddled with “murder hornets”, and mysterious monoliths popping up in remote areas around the world.

Oh, and let’s not even get started on the situation currently ongoing with our presidential election here in the United States.

But we can put all those other headlines to rest now, because 2020 has just given us the most shocking news story of the year:  Wisconsinites eat raw meat sandwiches on Christmas.

The Wisconsin Department of Health Services is urging residents to put down their cannibal sandwiches, also known as raw meat sandwiches, tiger meat or steak tartare.

“Many Wisconsin families consider them to be a holiday tradition, but eating them poses a threat for Salmonella, E. coli O157:H7, Campylobacter and Listeria bacteria that can make you sick,” the department wrote in a Facebook post Saturday, which it called its annual reminder. “Remember, ground beef should ALWAYS be cooked to an internal temperature of 160° F.”

The Milwaukee Journal Sentinel, part of the USA TODAY Network, included the sandwiches often served with raw onions on its 2018 list of Wisconsin’s favorite holiday culinary traditions.

The warning was trite and simply bizarre.

“If cannibal sandwiches are a tradition in your home, try this safe alternative: cook the ground beef with the same spices and toppings, until it reaches 160°F, and serve it on top of bread or crackers,” the USDA said. “You may be surprised to find that it tastes better when cooked! Not to mention, you won’t be risking a trip to the hospital with every mouthful.”

You have to think that the Wisconsin tourism board is thankful that the cheese lobby has as much money as they do.